Eggs on my face...

I love a good chopped salad, who doesn't, except maybe babies ... and those averse to green vegetables, I suppose. To them I say, "Fie!"

Before I offend non-salad eaters everywhere, I suffer my own aversions and one of them is a green-centered, hard-boiled egg. It's not that it tastes funny, maybe a bit dry, it's more that it looks funny and conjures thoughts of the classic Green Eggs and Ham, but who really wants to eat green eggs?

It's actually a sign you have over hard-boiled an egg which I'm sure is making you think, "You can over hard-boil an egg?" Yes. Just ask Mr. Breakfast.

I like a soft-boiled egg and typically come in at about a 7 minute boil time. Do not ask me what happened Sunday night that my eggs were not the perfectly soft-boiled goodness that I prefer. I can say that I was in the midst of a 'bad-day hangover' [i.e. befuddlement, exhaustion, and general crankiness due to a horrendous day beforehand].

I believe in my bad-day hangover I under soft-boiled my eggs and the result will live in egg infamy forever.

The first egg I peeled was the slightest bit runny in the center. Ew. I did not want runny egg on my chopped salad, however I also did not want to reboil the eggs. I freely admit I was lazy and hungry.

Ah-ha!!

I will simply zap the next egg in the nuclear [i.e. microwave] for a few seconds. I knew enough to peel the egg beforehand thus reducing the likelihood of anything bad happening, and 45 seconds later I removed the egg from the nuclear and set it into my handy egg slicer. As soon as the thin, metal wires hit the yolk -

"Poof!"

It exploded.

Now, I don't consider myself an expert in the physics of egg explosions, but I do consider this to be a fairly good explosion as there was a nice circumference of egg as far as 6 feet from where I stood. I wore a lovely sprinkling of egg which was definitely hot although I was lucky enough to escape any burns.

I shook the egg out of hair, brushed it off my clothes, wiped it off my face and the countertops, but opted to leave the bits on the floor for the dog who had himself a fantastic egg hunt when he got home.

Oh, and I laughed because really, what else can one do? It was funny, hilarious even. I don't think this was exactly what was meant by 'eggs on my face,' but conveniently enough I turned the expression into a literal meaning.

Yea me!

Enjoy some Oakhurst...